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Q. I really get upset because people are always joking about how short I am. I am a grown, mature female adult and it is really getting old. What can I say when someone makes fun of my height?
A. It is sad that some people in our society feel they can say anything to anyone and not care if they hurt someone’s feelings, or understand they are being disrespectful and totally rude. It is actually a type of bullying which is totally unacceptable.
I wish there were an etiquette rule specifically for addressing this kind of disrespectful comment — one that would politely stop it from happening again, but unfortunately, there isn’t.
Having said that, you have the choice of responding with:
“I am sorry, but your comment about my height hurts my feelings. Please don’t do that again.”
“Excuse me, but joking about my height may seem funny to you, but it is not funny to me at all. Please do not joke about my height.”
I know you and I were not brought up to carry on a conversation with adults who are disrespectful, but there comes a time in this current manners-deteriorating society for us to quietly, politely and matter-of-factly speak up. If someone never tells these rude people they are being rude and disrespectful, they might never “get it.” Your purpose would not be to start an argument, but to hopefully help someone learn to be a better person.
Q. I have been dating this man for a couple of months. He likes to go out for breakfast and he likes soft-boiled eggs. To be quite honest, I have never eaten a soft-boiled egg out of an egg cup so I would just like to know the proper way because I’m not sure this man knows exactly what the proper way is. Should the pointy end of the egg be up or the fatter end? (He says this can be a big deal to some people but he said he doesn’t really care.) Also, is it proper to dip thin slices of toast into the egg yolk or should you use a fork?
A. Seeing an egg in an egg cup for the first time in a public dining room can be a little intimidating.
1) Yes, believe it or not, some people like to start a discussion or argument about which end goes up. If dining out in a restaurant, you will more than not see the pointy end up. Some who dine at home put the fatter end up. Regardless of which “end is up,” the taste will be the same.
2) Yes, thinly cut strips of toast, often called “soldiers,” can be held in one’s hand, dipped into the yolk, and brought to the mouth to take a bite. It would be awkward to use a fork and knife for this purpose. Some people prefer the “soldiers” to be buttered; some do not.
3) A knife or an egg spoon or a teaspoon can be used to crack the shell. This is done with a horizontal movement, all the way around the egg. Then the tip of the knife is used to lift the top shell from the egg so it can be placed on the side of the little plate underneath the egg cup.
4) Some people put a small amount of salt and pepper on the side of their plate and then dip the spoon with a small amount of egg in the bowl into the salt and pepper. This could really get messy; therefore, it is permissible to sprinkle some of each condiment onto the egg yolk.
the egg yolk before the teaspoon is used to place some of the yolk onto the spoon.
5) Naturally, one must be careful not to get any of the shell into one’s mouth while eating a soft-boiled egg in this manner.