Metro-East Living

For me, retirement opens up the wonderful world of clickbait on the Internet

It was really hard to get this column written.

Not that it’s brilliant or deep, but it involved getting off the Internet and getting down to work.

That is getting harder and harder, especially since I am retired and don’t have to do all that much anymore. I keep my hand in journalism so to speak with a couple of these columns a month. That doesn’t take much time, however, and all that spare time can lead me down Internet rabbit holes.

There is so much to consider. I have to look at the “15 Countries Americans Are Not Welcome In,” even though I have never been out of this country. You never know.

It’s called clickbait, and it is all about getting you on a site so it can throw advertising at you.

“Top 7 Stocks To Buy” should make me a millionaire — if I looked at it.

These sites really go all out to attract viewers with titles such as “First Signs of Lung Cancer” and “Colon Cancer Symptoms” and “Male Dysfunction Treatments.”

I didn’t look at those, but I have at others. One site had a picture of a pair of adorable twin girls and wanted to know if I would like to see what they look like now. I clicked though 49 pictures, one page at a time, only to find out that they apparently look the same. I was curious to see what they looked like grown-up.

I should know better than to trust those kind of sites, but sometimes curiosity gets the best of me.

When a headline tells you it has important photos of historical events never seen before, chances are you have seen them. “Raw Unedited Photos From Woodstock” aren’t anything more than all the photos you have seen before from Woodstock.

I don’t know if “Royal Family Photographs You’ve Never Seen” actually were something new to me because I didn’t look.

Ditto for “How To Reheat Rice So It’s Light and Fluffy.” I don’t need to know that.

Many sites promise something but offer other things. For example, “2019 Average Retirement Income” wants you to buy someone’s annuity.

Guess I better exit all those sites and get back to solitaire. There is a special challenge today.

Or maybe it would be a better idea to get outside and do something useful before someone else sends me another compilation of all the top songs from the past year and I am compelled to watch it.

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