No ornaments hung this year because the Ninja Devils tried to eat the Christmas tree
I heard my husband scream from the next room. At first I thought he had hurt himself. Then I realized it was the cats who were about to be injured.
“I’m going to kill them!” Mark yelled, as two black furballs scurried in different directions.
He knelt before the Christmas tree and our elderly Chihuahua, Lola, waddled up beside him.
If Lola could talk, she would have said: “Yes, please kill them and let me watch.” Instead, she plopped down beside the man she loves, narrowing her eyes in disgust.
The Ninja Devils had climbed the tree again. And this time, they had taken down a branch.
The NDs — also known as Sprite and Sylvie Schrader — joined our family last winter when our son, Sam, found them hitchhiking along a dark country road. At the time they were sickly kittens with frostbitten tails. The vet pegged them at maybe three months old.
A year later, they have entered their “teen-aged phase,” which includes munching on Christmas decorations, knocking over poinsettias and stalking poor Lola.
“In her day, she would have eaten Sprite and Sylvie for breakfast,” I told, Sam, the guy who brought the Ninja Devils home and the man we have since nicknamed “The Catdaddy.”
“Yeah, I remember when she tried to pop the tires of the FedEx truck with her teeth,” he said.
Now toothless, Lola is no match for Sprite and Sylvie. Truth be told, we aren’t either.
And so our Christmas tree is bare except for tiny white lights. Our home is plantless, except for an aloe plant hidden in the kitchen. And our Chihuahua is always looking over her shoulder.
“They’re annoying but I love them,” I recently told my husband, as he basked in the glow of our bare Christmas tree. “C’mon, admit it. You love them too.”
Mark picked up the Chihuahua and the pair sat in silent solidarity.
Somewhere in the house, a cat started purring. It was the stuff Meow-y Christmases are made of.
