Couple and 12-year-old son killed in Bethalto crash remembered for impact on community
It was a “devastating” weekend for those who knew John, Melissa and Dominic Cafazza. But friends, students and classmates are remembering the three for their impact in the community.
John A. Cafazza, 55; Melissa R. Cafazza, 52; and Dominic J. Cafazza, 12, died Friday in a crash that occurred after the driver of another vehicle went through a stop sign, the Madison County Coroner’s Office reported Saturday.
Since then, residents of Bethalto have gathered to remember and grieve the family and support the Cafazza’s three surviving sons, A.J., Vinny and Nick.
At a candlelight vigil held Sunday, the number 24, which Dominic wore on his soccer jersey, decorated the football field at Civic Memorial High School. Hundreds gathered to grieve in an event school Superintendent Jill Griffin described as overwhelming.
“The reason we had to come together was tragic and awful but that embrace of community that we all felt is what we needed and I know it’s what the family needed,” she said, describing the Cafazza family as part of the “fabric of the community.”
“They are basically one of those families that are embedded within the community and when I say embedded I mean generationally. All four boys went through our school system,” Griffin said.
Dominic, who had just started his seventh-grade year at Trimpe Middle School, played soccer at the school and with Bethalto FC. Melissa helped prepare food for the high school’s football team every week and both she and John were avid supporters of the athletics programs. Each of their sons played a sport for the school district.
Hours after news broke that Dominic and his parents had been killed in the crash, Griffin said her email flooded with photos and videos of Dominic from his former teachers. She said he was described as a “bright light,” by one of his teachers.
“He stole the hearts of many,” Griffin said. “He was always smiling and happy to be wherever he was at that moment.”
Griffin said the vigil served the dual purpose of letting Nick, A.J. and Vinny know they weren’t alone even in their grief.
“We wanted those boys to leave that night knowing how loved and adored they are in our community and they did,” she said.
Griffin added that the vigil itself was a moment of healing for a community that was shocked by the abrupt loss of their classmate, colleagues and friends.
“The reason we had to come together was tragic and awful but that embrace of community that we all felt is what we needed,” she said. “We’re all just trying to wrap our arms around each other and get through this together. In crisis we come together.”
At the Bethalto School District, counseling is being offered to those who need it, including teachers. Griffin said it’s an “all-hands-on-deck situation” to help grieving students and community members, noting that the Collinsville School District has lent several members of its counseling staff to help.
Legacy at work, church
At Our Lady Queen of Peace — where the family attended church and Melissa “Missy” Cafazza, worked as a physical education teacher — Angie Worden said the crash has left a void.
“I’m not sure words can really describe the hole that is left here,” Worden said. “
Worden said on Monday, students made a memory banner in honor of their PE teacher, on which they shared favorite memories from her classes.
“So many of them talked about her laugh, her smile, her kind demeanor, her positivity and it was across the board with each grade,” Waldo said. “I think that’s because it’s one of the first things you noticed about Missy — her kindness and her caring.”
Both John and Melissa were avid athletes. Melissa taught aerobics at a local gym, Fitness and Fun, for 25 years and competed in marathons. John was an avid weightlifter and had been a well-known athlete in the area in his youth.
Worden said that Melissa Cafazza’s love for fitness was clear when students would leave her class.
“She was here one day a week but with that one day a week she changed the atmosphere of the school entirely,” Worden said, describing Melissa as a “mama bear.” “She’s built up a legacy here of positivity and movement and getting out there and giving the world your best shot.”
Beyond her work teaching, Cafazza was also an agent at Legacy Real Estate and Southeby’s Realty at the Lake of the Ozarks. She had a love for fitness, painting and decorating, according to an obituary.
Deeply invested in sons athletic careers
John Cafazza worked as a managing director at Travelers Insurance in St. Louis for more than 20 years. He had a passion for music and playing the guitar. He was known for his skill at trivia and enjoyed playing sports with his four sons, his obituary stated.
Griffin said Cafazza was heavily involved in his son’s athletic careers and would often share updates on his son’s post-high school activities. A.J., Vinny and Nick Cafazza are all Civic Memorial High School athletes and Vinny Cafazza just started his freshman year at McKendree University where he plays football.
Griffin said John Cafazza’s sons were a realization of his hopes and dreams, a continuation of his career as an athlete in his youth.
“They say a father’s hopes, dreams and accomplishments live on in his sons and that was certainly true for them,” she said. “He was so very proud of them.”
Visitation for the family was held from 3 p.m. to 8 p.m. Tuesday, Aug. 17, at Civic Memorial High School gymnasium in Bethalto. A funeral Mass will be held at 10 a.m. Wednesday, Aug. 18, at Holy Angels Catholic Church in Wood River.
Interment will be held privately.